Community Parties

Recently, I had the blessed opportunity to work with others to throw a party for a friend. The planning process was interesting because everyone seemed to have different ideas, but since not all the organizers knew each other well, there were some hiccups along the way. But one thing really stood out for me. One of the people helping to plan kept saying that the guest-of-honor was the most important. In essence, this person was saying that whatever the guest-of-honor would want or like is what we, as the people throwing the party, should do.

At first glance to most people, this probably appears to be a great way of looking at things. It really makes the guest-of-honor feel honored, special and loved. But, somehow, this mentality rubs me the wrong way.

This is probably more of a Christian principle about community, but I think it is important in general. A party is a social celebration. While the principle purpose of the party may be to honor a person(s), every aspect of the party should not be geared towards him/her/them. There are other people involved. Therefore, it is important to consider what the other guests may like as well. The guest-of-honor should still be held in high regards, but doing things for the guest-of-honor should never trump the importance of making the event enjoyable for EVERYONE, including those who are throwing the party.

Perhaps I have thought more about this than most people because I'm an event planner. One of my pet peeves when helping clients plan an event, especially a wedding, is when they don't consider the guests enough. It drives me nuts when a couple wants to do things that suit them, but are willing to put their friends, family, guests, and/or wedding party through financial hardship, extensive time occupation, or a lot of excessive work just to get what they want.

For example, I don't think it's right to choose a venue with excessive parking fees merely because you like the venue. (solution: pay for all or part of the parking, pick a venue with cheaper or free parking and/or advise people of cheaper or free parking nearby.) There are so many other things I've seen and observed... but it's probably best to not list them all for fear of offending my community.

In most instances, as I'm sure was the case with the party we recently planned, people don't intentionally try to make things difficult for others. It's just that intentional consideration is not usually present in decision-making. Does that make sense?

When a party is done well, the guest(s)-of-honor will feel special, honored and loved... but so will everyone else!

But the good thing is that the aforementioned party actually ended up being enjoyed by everyone. It's good to know that God works through all our inadequacies. =)